A slow guide to commuting with calm, curiosity, and a little bit of heart.

I don’t know why I like it, when everyone else hates it - missing a train, taking the long route, or just ending up somewhere unexpected.

Today I missed my train stop and ended up at the next one, which turned out to be the last station. I’ve done it a couple of times before. Sometimes, I even get down two or three stops before or after my actual destination. But it never frustrates me. Instead, I laugh at myself, “What did I just do?”

When I told my friend about it, she asked, “How did you not get frustrated? It’s office hour, everyone’s tense and rushing to get to work on time.” And I said, “Yes… But what can we do about it? What’s happened has already happened. You can’t change anything about it.”

She had a little trouble understanding my point of view, but eventually, she got it.
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I’ve always loved travelling by train. Something is exciting about it. It gives me a sense of calm and peace. Even if I miss a train, I don’t panic , I just wait for the next one.

I often see people running as if their life depends on catching that moving train.

Maybe they’re really in a hurry. But not everything in life is an ultimate urgency.

Even if I’m late to the office, I never rush. If I miss a train, I’ll call the office staff and simply say, “I missed it, my bad,” and get along. Not at the last minute, of course , but if it happens, it happens.

It also takes courage to ask for an excuse or offer an apology. But that’s another topic for another day.
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Here’s my little guide to making the most of your train journey:

1. Pick a window seat.
Choose the seat opposite the train’s movement; that way, you’ll feel the wind rushing onto your face. If you don’t get a window seat, that’s fine too. Stand near the door with your headphones on.
2. Listen to music, but not too loud.
Don’t scroll through Instagram, TikTok, or YouTube. Just put on some soft music, not to drown the world out completely, but just enough to soften the environmental sounds.
3. Read a book or a Medium article.
Don’t worry too much about the stops. If you’re a regular traveler, you’ll have an intuition for when your stop is near. Just get into the flow of reading.
4. Sometimes, wear headphones with no music.
Just to avoid distractions. People think you’re listening to something, but really, you’re just listening to nothing. I don’t eavesdrop; I just enjoy silence sometimes.
5. Observe people.
Not in a creepy way, just notice the faces. You’ll see happiness, sadness, anger, love… all the emotions. Ah, for me it made me feel like I’m alive
6. Or don’t look at anyone.
Just look down. One day, I saw a little cockroach stumbling under the seat. No one noticed, it was invisible in a crowd glued to their screens. I found it oddly fascinating. That’s when I said to myself that I, try to notice what other people are missing, to notice.
7. Help others when needed.
Be the first to help. I once helped a woman on the train, and it reminded me of a beautiful relationship from my past. I even wrote a story https://medium.com/activated-thinker/a-smile-a-moment-a-memory-bb22748cdda9 about it.
8. Sit with your thoughts.
Talk to yourself (not loudly, of course). Just sit peacefully and reflect. You might even miss your station.
9. Help the elders.
If you’re seated and you see an elderly person standing in front of you, give up your seat and accept their blessings. That small act stays with you.

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This is my short guide to travelling by train. I’ve probably missed a lot, but if you want to add your own experiences, feel free to share them via email.

Train journeys have slightly shifted my pace of living. They’ve taught me to notice little things, the spider’s web on an old fan, the rhythm of the tracks, the unnoticed moments.

They remind me that I’m here, *not in the past, not in the future, but in the present.* And that’s a beautiful place to be.
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